When I give myself my heparin injection I have to "pinch an inch" of subcutaneous tissue on my side to insert the syringe. I'm right handed, so I pinch with my left hand and have my shot ready in my right hand. What happened next wasn't part of my typical routine and broke up my Friday the 13th madness.
I felt the complete form of a little foot rub against my left hand. She kept her foot there for a moment and then rolled on past. How am I supposed to resume a normal day after that? Seriously! This precious little baby took a moment to stretch out and not just kick(which is what she usually does) but linger there long enough to make it feel intentional.
I've had emotional moments, but most have just left me in awe and wonder, especially during all of my ultrasounds. For the first time since finding out I was pregnant I teared up from pure joy. I'm so ready for Madeline to be here, to remove the worries of delivery and complications. I can't wait to hold her, but I cannot wait to see Jordan hold her and become the amazing father that I know he is going to be.
Immediately I thought of the Coach Valvano's ESPY speech(if you haven't seen it, stop what you are doing now and either read or listen to his speech,click here for a link to the script and video ). My favorite quote from that speech is this:
"Number one is laugh. You should laugh every day. Number two is think. You should spend some time in thought. Number three is, you should have your emotions moved to tears, could be happiness or joy. But think about it. If you laugh, you think, and you cry, that’s a full day. That’s a heck of a day. You do that seven days a week, you’re going to have something special."So by the definition of Coach Valvano and my own joy, I've officially had a very full and special day and it's not even noon. No words are worthy of how I feel, but this is what my brain could come up with:
Thank you God for the ways that you have blessed me. My heart bursts with emotion and gratitude that my words cannot begin to conjure literature appropriate to express their depths. So often life's brevity is shoved in our faces, but thank you for slowing down my day. Thank you for those blissful seconds where every heartbeat pulsed for an eternity and I was bathed in your peace. Amidst my day of chaos I thank you for the little foot that reached out to calm my soul. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.